When will we ever learn?

After those good times, here comes the bad. I was always sure of this – whenever something good happens to me, something to counteract this fortune will definitely happen next. Well, that’s life. It has ups and downs.

In riding roller-coasters, most of us feel dizzy and disoriented after some time. Some of us even vomit. But as time passes by, when we get used to riding these thrilling rides, we won’t feel anything anymore. Instead, we just go with the flow, shout our hearts out and enjoy the ride. Couldn’t we also apply this in our daily lives – get used to the ride, learn from our previous experiences and have fun?

Our family used to be a very happy one. We were close to each other. In the past, we would usually go to our relatives’ house during Saturdays, have dinner there and talk about how our week went. We watched tv together, shared some laughter and even shed some tears when stories shift from joyful to gloomy. That was our family.

Several years passed, these relatives of ours went abroad and the only only family left here in the country was ours. What they left in the country was our old ancestral house which is owned by deceased grandmother and the family’s business in the market. My step-grandmother said that she would let her sister’s family stay in the ancestral house temporarily so that there would be someone to maintain it. She was also allowed to handle the business, still temporarily.

That has been the source of our problems now. What she said to be just temporary turned out to be for good as this new family which occupied our ancestral house never want to leave it and the business again. They claimed possession of these gifts from my deceased grandmother when in fact, they have no right to stay there and claim those properties. They do not belong in our clan, her sister was just my grandfather’s second wife and those properties were not even named after her, it was still under my grandmother’s name!

What’s even worse is that they call us the ones who claim everything. They call us selfish and self-centered people who want everything to be ours. Oh, the guts to say those things! First of all, we don’t want the ancestral house so that we could live there – our house is even prettier and larger than that. Second of all, we’re not claiming it just because we want to be rude or whatever, we’re getting it back since we want to take care of our grandmother’s inheritance and keep it in the family. We do not want them to be deprived but we don’t want them to be abusing our kindness. Those filthy liars and gold-diggers. What even gets in my (our) nerves was that when my step-grandmother was asked why she married my grandfather even if he’s already old, she said that she thought my grandfather was rich! The neeerve! She wouldn’t have gotten to the US if not for my family. She wouldn’t have been able to make my uncles graduate if not for my family’s business. And now that her time’s over and they’re already somehow successful in life, they’re also claiming everything that we lent them to be theirs. Oh please. Then they’ll call us the selfish ones? What the actual f*ck.

What I’ve meant to be a reflective blog entry turned out to be a story-telling one. Sorry for the bad words, I was just carried away by my emotions. But why should I be sorry to you? Haha. Whatever. My point here is that, yes, we may have problems, but in the entire duration of our lives, haven’t we learned to listen, understand and forgive? I think this is the main reason of our problems now. We fail to open our ears and minds, and refuse to listen to our hearts.

I am still young to be listened to but I think I have this clear perspective that could help rebuild our destroyed relationship. Or not? I don’t know. But with all of these biases and refusal to listen and understand, I think we’re going nowhere.

We are stuck at the bottom of the roller-coaster and if we won’t learn from all of these heartaches, we will never get back up and finish the ride together.


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