What if there are still some things that preoccupy you no matter how much time passes? What if there is still a part of you that has never recovered from the war you waged ages ago? What if that part never recovers, ever?
The first time I got heartache, I never thought I’ll be able to smile again. I had always kept hope inside of me — though I never admitted it to anyone — that somehow and somewhere down the road, something will be on again between us. I never stopped hoping before. I once fooled myself into thinking that my heart had changed its course, but it knows better. It was still coming back to him no matter what.
And then I reached that point wherein I knew for sure I didn’t want something back between us. I didn’t want him back the way he used to be in my…
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