What It Takes To Get The Love You Deserve

Thought Catalog

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I once lived my life as if there was no other way of being except to be thin, tanned, and a carbon copy of other people I assumed were happier than me. And, for this reason, I caused my own suffering. I shed blood at the hands of my own destructive assumptions about how I was supposed to live. I fueled my own self-hatred as a perverse motivation for me to change my body, my life, my skin, my anything that I assumed was preventing me from being accepted and loved. I never asked myself what I want because there was no mental space in which to do so. All I could hear were the voices of people who I thought knew where I had misplaced my happiness. 

When I was single, I felt intensely rejected. I was convinced of my inadequacy, piling on evidence by using unavailable men…

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